Game Theory and friends go on Judge Judy
by Rivfruifv
Summary: Muh winnuhz.
1. Chapter 1

Okay so this is my first time wirhgting a play so fuck you asshole.

 **Act 1 Scene 1: Da ovaturh n shit**

So one day Game Theory sucked, as usual. So den JonTron sued Matt Patt for suckeng and decided to call Judge Judy so he could embarrass him on national televishon. The show woud nver be the same again.

[Enter JonTron and Matt Patt who r calld forward at the request of Officer Byrd]

Judge Judy: Okay so Mr. Tron according to these stupid-ass papers ur suing this piece of shit defendant for $5000 because he sucks.

Matt Patt: Now actually according to my calculations-

Jurdy: Shut the fuck up I didn't ask for yur ppopinion. [bops Matn on da noggin with her judge hammr]

Jon: But yeah I want $5000 to fund the search for my hat that went missing sometime ago as well as a new video on why Gmae Theroyu sux.

Matt: Now according to my calculations becuase JonTron's hat is yellow and is approxamiately 5.000000000000000 inches in diameter-

Jardege: If you interrupt plaintiff again then I throw you out. [tips her glasses anime style so they lit up n shit; what the fuck is this, Las Vegas?]

Mantle: Excuse me ur honor but I have a witness.

[Enter Francis frum da left 4 dead]

Francis: I hate small towns. What the hell is this? [CAWPZ]

Jordy: Now witness person is it possible for you to giv me a raisin as to why I shudn let da plaintiff sue this guy.

Francis: EOUH. [picks up desk n tras t throw it at Judi]

Judri: [deflects da desk thingeh] That's it u stupid shit; yar not allowed to apparel in amnytonemer fanfiction. Gudbye. [banishes Francis from existence I suppose]

Francis: [is banished from existence I suppose]

Matt: Oh well, atleast I hav myhj team. [assembles abomindanble critical research team of evul]

 _Enter:_

*Donald Trump

*Nigel Thornberry

*CJ

*Jeremy from Hell's Kitchen

*Francis

Judy: Now Froncius I tough I told u to get the fuck out of this story-

Francis: I hate hospitals. Hey Louis, you look like shit. [throws a picnic table at Jyrdine which causzeds her to exploded n died]

Officer Byrd: Shit mannnnnnnnnnn. [flees]

JonTron: Lolfl your'e team is shit. Watch htis. [assembles critical review tiem of his owrn]

 _Enter:_

*Gordon Ramsay

*John Lennon Squidward

*Winston Smith

*A trader from Fable

*Tumblr

Gordon Ramsay: **IT'S FUCKING** _ **RAAAAAAAAAAAAW.**_ [throws a spectacular spatula at Trump]

Trumpet: Now I msot certin;ylaly would lkiemne to letm this spactula make an honroable move on myssreklf, except that the handle of said spactuactlopar is black. Good sire, go fuck yourself. [brushes away spavc like it's nothing before setting up a podium to give an epic speech on why he thinks black people are evul; but why?]

Jeremy: The thr-three halibut, the two, two- uhhh... [scratches his cheek sorta]

Ramsay: _**GET OUT.**_

 _Exit Jerm_

Winston Smith: [will be observing current area for the next 510 minutes]

Trumpnard: Now before I begin this epsice speech on why you should vote for my hair I woudl justs like tp thank Twix Official Klondie Bars for promoting mu cmapainga-

CJ: [shoves Trimp off of htis pdiumo and steps up to mthe muci] Now before I begin this epsice speech on why you should vote for my crossovers I woudl justs like tp thank Xaragon Offical Skype Group for liking Christian Hendrix also Rooty T. Booty sounds like Kevin from Ed Edd n' Eddy and that fat guy keeps calling me the worst person-

Rasnmnay: Hold on, turn the volume down you fat fuck. [starring in Scotenglandish]

Trader from Fable guy: Ehrm... [whimpering in Engscotlandish]

CJ: [Gloating in CJ]

 _Enter PeanutButterGamer_

Peanuts with Charlie Brown: Uhm, exucusdew me, you mean

 **MY MONEY, MURREY**

 **YOU SPENT ALL OF MY MONEY**

 **AND DESPITE P-BOT'S PLEASED EXPRESSIANO** -

Frnacis: I hate small towns. [picks up Peanut Batter n theows him out nda windoariops] EOUH

Nigel Thornberry: Also what is John Lennon Squidward.

John Lennon Squidward: Hahaha I ahev rarived wit ma ultimate new taemine whie all you guys werre fuicking around for no reason.

 _Enter:_

*Bernie Sanders

*Brooklyn Boys (Tony and Simon from 42/11)

*Vagineer as the actual protagonist of Half-Life 2

*The question mark from Sonic Adventure

*Sheevul (I don't even know who that is rofl)

*Chris Brown

*Holden Caulfield

*Bill Nye

*President Keager Sanae Johnny Boatswain Wattanstein

Jonny Lemon Squid Ink: Yeah daz ryemfgfnt motherufckers I got fuckving NIEN membmers on ma taem yar'slk think you can beat that assfuckas?!~?!1/

 _Enter the writer of this story_

Wirter guy or something I dunno: Okay I think their's too many characters in this shit like how ar ewe even supopsed ot put this in theater or some shit with like 20 fucking distuinguishable chjaracters-

Bill Nye: William Shakespeare's _Much Ado About Nothing_ had 30-50 characters.

Writer: [Are die]

 _Exit all characters I think?_

 **Okay so I guess I have to go find a knew wirhgjfter or sometinf shit so tune in next time and see what happens when hewe have trhge teams playing the game or whatever I dunno it's a fucking play and nobody rwrlaelalyly writes thoguse anymore except for hipster fucks who r 2edgy fopr this novel shit that people put out these days.**


	2. Chtp 2: Written by George Orwell

**Chtp 2: Written by George Orwell**

It has been 1701 years since the untimely desolation of New York City and, for that matter, Pencey Preparatory, the school Holden Caulfield first attended before heading for New York City. The somehow immortally-aged Caulfield looked back at the ruins of the city, before popping another cigarette in his mouth and lighting it up, taking a gentle puff. Silently, he walked over to the exact bus where he met that one fine lady after untimately leaving the school, having been kicked out for his horrendous grades.

"They were all phonies anyway." He scoffed indifferently, taking another puff from his cigarette as the ashes continued crumbling to the ground like biscuit crumbs.

He tipped the edge of his hat, for whatever reason, before strolling along to another area of the completely destroyed city. He stumbled upon the fountain in the center of the city, near where his house was, where he once briefly contemplated about the fact that it was winter in New York, before continuing on his adventure back to his family's hou-

?: A'ight foo I think daz enuffh outam you. [Beats Goergle Worels over da head wiz a baseball glove] Ahm writnzg sidsz fucking story now.

Okay mah niggaz so fuckin I don't env3n cahre abount how many fuckign years itsn beaen since Neyakwr Sitting has been fucked but there's like a guy holding coffins or some hsitnz I dunno is his name Hoolendne Cofaldhjadl or whatever the ufck?

So, um, like, y'know, some asshole demastoryded trhe entire fucking city and some stupid-ass low-funded scholl that nobyd's ever even been to; y'see J.D. Saligner or Goetgwre Workdle or Shakespiralcast or whoever the fuck wrote this book got high as fuck off cocaine and pesto gouda cheese when he/she/xhe/zhe/yhe/qhe/que/ahe/aye/AYY/AYY HOW YE' DOIN'/bhe/bae/baby/WILL BABY FIND A WAY/I got baby to pound me/We called him baby/doh babiez/dhe/day/daz/whe/WEI/Yeah WAAAAAAYYYYYYS/jhe/khe/lhe/rhe/rhetoric/YOU'RE WASTING TIME WITH YOUR RHETORIC/uhe/ihe/ohe/phe/fhe/ghe/gay/mhe/nhe/I Say Nay-Nay, a comedy routine originally done by John Pinette in the early 2000's/che/chu/CHAAUUUUU/PICHUR/vhe/vase/nigga did you just break that vase?/NIGGA DID I JUST CATCH YOU HAVIN' FUN?/Samuel L. Jackson/the/oh hey that's an actual word rofl/hhe/fuckwat wrote this ancient-ass bullshit.

Yo' hold on I gotta take a break from writing this to jam out to this kickass song. Y'all know whatddma sayin mah niggaaaaaaaa~?

Wasting your days  
Chasing some girl's alright.  
Chasing cocaine  
Through the backrooms of the world all night.  
Wasting your days  
Chasing some girl's alright.  
Chasing cocaine  
Through the backrooms of the world all night.

Sounds, Smash Hits, Melody Maker, NME,  
All sound like a dream to me.  
All sound like a dream to me.  
All sounds like a dream...  
Sounds, Smash Hits, Melody Maker, NME,  
All sound like a dream to me.  
All sound like a dream to me.  
All sounds like a dream...

Step out of your toga and into the fog,  
You are a prince on the ocean...  
(In a pinch, in the sky, in your eye)  
Step out of your toga into the ocean,  
Look they got your prints on the fog...  
(In a pinch, in the sky, in your eye)

Okay so that song was called "Kaputt" by Destroyer I think. Check 'em out sometime on Spotify or iTunesfy or YouTubefy or SoundCloudfy or Bandcampfy or whatever the fuck yopu use to lsiten to yer shitty-ass pop music, because if you

LIKE

THE WAY

YOU LOOK THAT MUCH

THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD GO AND **FUCK YOURSELF**

Okay fuck that daz liek beigmbaer or sum shit ah dunono.

(Seriously what the fuck was I doing)

{Oh yeah I was writing some stupid-ass book or some shit or like a Holdrnen Cpaouglfineld fanfiction with furries in it or something. Maybe I should've jhust gottdenjddn Goeorgte Hweorhyewll or some other fukcas who actually enjoy doing dishizstrst to write it instead but oh well.}

[They're probably already dead by now anyways.]

Okay dude seriously this song right'ere is my fuckign jam so turn it up my nigaagazsz.

Everything is quiet since you're not around  
And I live in the numbness now  
In the background  
I do the things we did before  
I walk Haight Street to the store  
And they say where's that crazy girl  
You don't get drunk on red wine and fight no more  
I don't see you anymore since the hospital  
The plans I make still have you in them  
Cause you come swimming into view  
And I'm hanging on your words  
Like I always used to do  
The words they use so lightly  
I only feel for you  
I only know because I carry you around  
In the background  
I'm in the background  
Words they come and memories all repeat  
I lift your head while they change the hospital sheets  
And I would never lie to you no  
I would never lie to you no  
I felt you long after we were through, we were through  
The plans I make still have you in them  
Cause you come swimming into view  
And I'm hanging on your words  
Like I always used to do  
The words they use so lightly  
I only feel for you  
I only know because I carry you around  
In the background  
Cause I felt you long after we were through  
Well you come swimming into view  
And I'm hanging on your words  
Like I always used to do  
The words they use so lightly  
I only feel to you  
I only know because  
I'm way I'm way in the background  
I'm in the background

Okay so that was "The Background" by Third Eye Blind or something I guess. You probably know them for "Jumper" and/or "Semi-Charged Life" (yeah it's definitely charged n not charmed mk) but nobody fucking cares.

So yeaher fuckingh Hoderendldn Coafuwthrld foudenr dis buzsle y'see and he climbgded insdife to find that there was soem really fucking hot chick in there.

"Fuck yeha, finlayly someone whom cn fulfijll mah cigarette and rediciously large vodxcabuastruy respective fetishes." The 15-year-old fuck said as he approaches the seuxal objectification obejct further. It was

Oh god.

This ain't gonna go down well my friends.

 **LADEH PALUTAYNUH**

"Fkcnin' yasssssssssssssssss" bithc-ass Calfueedhld said to himself. "I huv discrecoverd da ultimaztse fetishist fanservice Nintendo character right behind Viridi/Phosphera/Wii Fit Trainer/Zero Suit Samus/Rosalina/Peach/Daisy/Toadette/Zelda/Lyn/Lucina/Ashley from WarioWare/Isabelle from Animal Crossing/every fucking Pokemon girl ever/female Pikachu/Gardevoir/female Villager from Animal Crossing/Wendy O. Koopa/Purple Pikmin/Birdo/Bayonetta/Mr. Game & Watch/Bob from Animal Crossing."

 **Okay so i'm just really too tired to go into detail with the part where he fucks her fat ass in her sleep so i'm gonna go to bed now. Goodnight. Maybe i'll continue this some other time but what the fuck ever.**


End file.
